That girl.

That girl next to you,
Right next to you,
Right next to you,
On that sky high sea cliff
On that mountain side and the end of the world
Of earth and terre did not jump.

She didn’t because of the fires burning around her,
Because of the people who sat in silence staring out at, at creation
All symbolizing that life was worthwhile

That girl next to you
Right next to you
Right next to you,
Did not jump off the cliff of life and into creation and reflection,
Into a thousand stabbing knives

That girl next to you,
Right next to you,
Right next to you
On that cliff, that slide of rocks, of fog and love indistinguishable
On that mountainside against the horizon of life,
Did jump

Did jump, she did
Because of the fires surrounding her, burning, burning evermore
Because of the people who sat in silence staring out at, at creation
All symbolizing,
The lies that life was worthwhile

That life in all its entity and shortness is meant to be lived,
That although we die eventually and where is the purpose in not dying now,
We live anyway for the streaks,
For the blots and splotches against the canvas
For the memories,
The sorrow and hardship
The valleys and peaks
For the sensation,
For the vibrating color,
For the chills tingling down our spines and creating goose bumps

For the epiphanies we realize everywhere,
Nowhere and always,
Next to you, Right next to you,
Right next to you.





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This article has 6 comments. Post your own now!

chamomile This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Aug. 13, 2012 at 7:35 pm
I love the juxtaposition you made between choosing life or death, and both 'characters' seeing the same thing differently. The language you chose was just amazing. I am not a fan of the way you repeated "right next to you", I would make one of them slightly different but still convey the same message, like 'that girl next to you, directly beside you" so it's not so redundant. That being said, this is a matter of artistic license, so do what you feel is right
 
liveamongthestarsdieamongthepeople replied...
Aug. 18, 2012 at 10:16 pm
Thanks so much for the critisism and everything!:) its helpful. Yeah i can see how it would get redundant i did it mostly to be a ballad. But i might change it just so its not repeated twice each time. Thanks:)
 
HarryPotterLover30 replied...
Sept. 22, 2012 at 7:00 pm
On agree on the non appealing way of the repetition of that oine line, but other than that, i love your poem and have no furtyher crittisism. It's quite awesome. :)  
 
liveamongthestarsdieamongthepeople replied...
Sept. 23, 2012 at 10:30 am
i need to get on this editing:)
 
RayBaytheDinosaur said...
Aug. 12, 2012 at 12:00 am
This is a very interesting and thoughtful poem, you're a great writer :)
 
liveamongthestarsdieamongthepeople replied...
Aug. 12, 2012 at 1:22 am
thanks,i'd love any comments on how it could be better or thoughts. thats sweet:)
 
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