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That Dark November

I've always been the child who always wears a smile
The girl that never cries
The one who never has to wait a while
The kid who is strong
The child that's always wrong
But honestly that's not me at all
I was beaten and hurt
I was thrown in the dirt
Why do you seem not to see?
Why don't YOU try to be me?
I apologize if I have to cry.
I'm sorry sometimes I want to die.
If I scream in the night
It's because I remember.
Don't be mad if I wake you up
In the middle of December.
"I had a bad dream Mommy,"
I'll say
"Where is Uncle Tommy?"
And you tell me to go away.
You don't want me to know
You took me somewhere safe.
But the memories arre still there
The scars, I still bare.
"Why does my collar bone stick out so bad?"
"Why do I have scary dreams about my step-dad?"
"Where is my brother?"
"Where is my mother?!"
"Who are you really??"
My ankle pops when I walk
My jaw pops when i talk.
"Sometimes I think bad things Mom."
As I grew I remembered more and more
My little brother screaming behind a closed door.
"Why am I here and my siblings are not Mother?"
You are only really my grandmother.
"Where ic my sister?"
"Where is my brother?"
Why do I have to remember?
What happened that dark November?



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