Two Moons with my Father

August 15, 2011
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Sitting by the bay
keeping time with the sway
of warm, soft waves.
My feet dangle over the dock
my ears listen to the tick-tock
of his water-proof watch.

We sit there in silence.
He glances at his daughter
as I watch the moon rise
over water.

I notice suddenly, two moons.
One an image of the first,
not quite imitating its creator,
Smiling in reverse.

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dancestar said...
Aug. 17, 2011 at 11:56 am
that was a very sweet poem, at the end, i was like was also very well written...good job! and plz check out my work like "Dear Dad" and "Girl Next Door" I think you'll like it : )
BeLoveToday This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Aug. 17, 2011 at 8:21 am
This is a lovely poem with simple but resounding imagery. Your choice of rhyme helps the language flow, and sounds pleasing to the ear. I can easily picture this moment, and you do well at presenting the important details, without ornate and flowery language. Also, I love the last line; it's very clever and makes you think. "Smiling in reverse," could mean a few different things, but I like that you leave it up to interpretation. Very nice piece, thanks for sharing!
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