Magazine, website & books written by teens since 1989

Part of my Life This work is considered exceptional by our editorial staff.

The first time I cut myself
It was just a test
To see if I could handle it
I didn’t do my “best”

The second time I did it
It released some pain
“But after this,” I told myself
“I won’t do it again.”

I didn’t keep that promise
This went on for several years
Until my parents heard of it
And they were in great fear

But they thought I could stop it
So they got me some help
But the self-harm continued
I was making their lives Hell

So one day they decided
To send me away
The first day I was there
I didn’t want to stay

This place was my boarding school
Though I can’t tell you the name
It’s quite renowned in Utah
And I hated it for its fame

I faked it for a little while
Said I was alright
But I knew they were catching on
And I knew they were right

Then one day it happened
My very violent act
A slapped my friend way to hard
And then I turned my back

But that’s not where this story ends
‘Cause then I got a rope
Determined to hang myself
Because I felt no hope

Good thing someone caught me
‘Cause now I’m glad I didn’t die
I haven’t said this before
But I tried to several times

I gradually got better
And then one day I heard
I’d be going home in three months
That news shook my world

Now I’m home and healthy
Though I still feel pain
I know how to deal with it
I’ll never hurt myself again



Join the Discussion


This article has 15 comments. Post your own!

Mickey17 said...
today at 4:27 pm:
that was amazing proud of you for telling your story. wish i could
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
MarisaCoulterCrazyWriterThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Oct. 12, 2012 at 8:59 pm:
I think that this is undoubtedly the most moving poem I have read in forever, and that you are very courageous to have written it and shared your story. You are an inspiration to people who have had the same problem.
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
MarisaCoulterCrazyWriterThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Oct. 12, 2012 at 8:59 pm:
I think that this is undoubtedly the most moving poem I have read in forever, and that you are very courageous to have written it and shared your story. You are an inspiration to people who have had the same problem.
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
KatsKThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
May 3, 2012 at 5:49 pm:
I'm really sorry that all of that happened to you. I really like this and you are a good writer, by th eway.
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
.Izzy. said...
Jul. 3, 2011 at 9:15 pm:
Very powerful. I'm glad you shared your story. You're a very talented writer(:
 
.Izzy. replied...
Jul. 6, 2011 at 9:23 pm :
Hi again! I was on tumblr and I saw that someone put your poem on their blog. Just thought you'd like to know.
 
ColorfulExpectations replied...
Jul. 16, 2011 at 8:07 pm :
Oh yeah, I have a blog too LOL it was probably just me. :)
 
ColorfulExpectations replied...
Jul. 17, 2011 at 9:07 am :
Hey, actually, can you tell me how you found it? for some reason I thought tumblr was that website where you can find random other websites. That was most definitely NOT me. xP FAIL.
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
TwinnBears27This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Jul. 1, 2011 at 7:07 pm:
 Your story is very moving, and the way you put it into words like that is amazing. (You remind me very much of a close friend:)) Great Writing!!! 
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
freeflow23 said...
Jun. 28, 2011 at 2:38 pm:
This deserves to be published. I'm glad you weren't afraid to tell your story. This is my favorite poem of yours. Keep writing.
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
DenaliTheOlive said...
Mar. 7, 2011 at 8:17 pm:

Dear Best Friend,

You are, without a doubt, the strongest person I've ever met. You've gone though so much, and I remember how hard that was for both of us. I thank God everyday for your health, and that you're still alive. I love you so much :)

Love,

Your Butt Monkey

<3

 
ColorfulExpectations replied...
Mar. 17, 2011 at 3:22 pm :

OMFG!!!! YOU GOT A TEENINK!!! I love you so much, hun. I really appreciate everything you've done for me. Please never forget that!

Love MORE,

Your personal boot pump. xD

 
DenaliTheOlive replied...
Mar. 24, 2011 at 10:27 pm :

B3 I'M LOVED. BEST. FEELING. EVARRR. 

 

PS TEACH ME HOW TO WRITE POEMS. LIKE NAO. :I

 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
Expexted said...
Feb. 24, 2011 at 3:55 pm:
This is amazing <3 i truly understand what your going through, and I love the way you wrote it. keep writing. Its amazing :)
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
ColorfulExpectations said...
Feb. 15, 2011 at 7:51 pm:
Comments, please? :)
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
Site Feedback