The Flaws of Facebook

January 5, 2010
By LadyLazarus22 BRONZE, New York, New York
LadyLazarus22 BRONZE, New York, New York
4 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
There must be quite a few things that a hot bath won't cure, but I don't know many of them. -Sylvia Plath

Listen to this messed up story
that I will tell you now
of a young girl named Tory
and how she turned into a cow. was Tory’s life
She spent each day obsessing
And how it brought her awful strife,
I am at last professing.

I’ve kept this tale quiet for long
But now it’s time to tell
And so I will now sing a song,
I hope I sing it well.

Tory passed all of her day,
stalking each facebook friend
seeing what their walls did say,
what messages they send.

She looks at profiles and at pics
Relishing each one,
And with a couple hundred clicks,
She finds the greatest fun.

She reads her comments and feels cool,
Writes back with eager glee,
But really she is just a tool,
Who’s saying, “Look at me.”

This may not seem like a big deal,
Just a way to socialize
But Tory does forget what’s real,
and this is not so wise.

She forgets about the trees outside,
Her family and her goals,
Time passes like an ocean tide
When facebook steals your soul.

Uploading is all that counts,
Friends she does not call
Books unread do start to mount
But she only reads her wall.

We must now stop this,
The gods above do cry
She falls into a deep abyss,
The hole of wi and fi.

We’ll give her a last chance
the gods at last decide.
To break free from this trance,
fate must be her guide.

She must now say a vow
To never go online
to live only in the “now”,
And focus on the fine.

Tory, scared, agrees to change
But she can’t resist the pull,
She is like one in derange,
When she sees her inbox full.

She snaps and clicks,
And so her fate is sealed,
Life was not as good as pix,
For now she’s in a field.

“Moo! Moo!” She cried,
Alone and scared at last
“It was a joke, I lied!”
But the time was passed.

For the gods turned Tory to a cow,
As a lesson to us all
To live in the here and now,
Not on just someone’s wall.

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This article has 9 comments.

on Apr. 23 2010 at 7:20 pm SILVER, Spring Lake Park, Minnesota
7 articles 0 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Excuses are like BUTT HOLES, they stink and everyone has one." ~Mr.Bogle (my math teacher)

This is so going on my facebook wall :) lol!

woodgal said...
on Jan. 29 2010 at 2:57 pm
Loved it!! Am now going out to be with the trees.......

Fringey said...
on Jan. 29 2010 at 11:54 am
This is an excellent poem, most definitely should be a contender for the magazine.

quills said...
on Jan. 28 2010 at 5:35 pm
I like this poem, it's obvious a lot of work went into it! (Though I'm not going to share it with my facebook friends, for fear of repercussions!)

Viancs said...
on Jan. 28 2010 at 3:09 pm
This poem rocks—it is both enthralling and juicy. You are undoubtedly a true talent. Please, keep them coming.

doodle said...
on Jan. 23 2010 at 10:34 am
I loooooove it it is amazing!!!!!

the writer must be freaking awesome!!!!!!

loooove it!!!!

you should get published

on Jan. 21 2010 at 7:43 am
babigerl1194 PLATINUM, Margaretville, New York
23 articles 10 photos 155 comments

Favorite Quote:
wat doesnt kill you only makes you stronger

wow i usualy dont like anythign other than romaance but htis caught my attantion and held my interest and the flow was just amazing looooooved it!!!

-plz spread ht wealth and check out ome of my worx =)

SusanBones said...
on Jan. 20 2010 at 4:32 pm
What a lovely poem. The narrative voice that runs throughout it is very well written - it serves to guide the reader through the poem but at the same time allows one to interpret the message of the poem however she wishes. At first, because of the lilting rhythm, the poem may feel lighthearted. But, when one takes a minute to think about the message behind it, she may realize how much more complex it is, both in form and in content.

cj123 said...
on Jan. 20 2010 at 10:45 am
This is such a clever poem! The rhyme scheme works so well and creates a wonderful rhythm that carries the reader through the story. A truly excellent ballad. More teens should read this! What an interesting way to open a discussion about the perils of facebook!

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