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Death of a Smile

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Cheer up baby, you're too pretty to be sad
Too hard to watch your eyes turn red when they're mad
shh, little lady, you're too beautful to cry
make your lips curl up as I beg you to lie
Hush now little girl, bite your lips and keep it in
No use in denying that you live in sin
Tune them out baby, you're doing just fine
cut the marks and swallow all to kill time
wait for light in a neverending tunnel
and when it crashes down be subtle
but inside that's the day you die
we all live longer when we lie...



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Hallieinthewings said...
Feb. 3, 2010 at 3:45 pm:
I definitely like the idea you have going here; you leave it open enough for interpretation but still get the point across. the last line is my favorite.
 
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EmoTwisted said...
Jan. 21, 2010 at 8:47 am:
i agree with them. I love how you make it seem like your a mother telling your little kids that.lol
 
emilyj93 replied...
Jan. 21, 2010 at 5:26 pm :
That's a really cool way to look at it! When I wrote it, my first thoughts were that it was written from an abusive boyfriends point of view but I like how you interpretted it, it gives it a whole new meaning. Thank you for reading!
 
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Kay4theRoses said...
Jan. 19, 2010 at 12:42 pm:
i agree with dreamer_believer. it was really good and i like how you made it sound like you were talking to someone, although no ever talks like that out loud.
 
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dreamer_believer said...
Jan. 19, 2010 at 10:19 am:
wow that was a really good poem. i like how you used the words/phrases like "cheer up baby" and "shh little lady". it made the poem seem a little more personal ;) and i LOVE the line "we all live longer when we lie". it sometimes seems like that doesn't it? all around great job :) would you mind checking out some of my work? id love your opinion :) thanks and keep writing! ;) :) :)
 
Emily J. replied...
Jan. 20, 2010 at 5:32 pm :
thank you so much! I love to get feedback on my poems and of course I'll check out your stuff!
 
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