April 3, 2009
By Anonymous

you might think you know just how i feel, but truthfully there;s no way you can tell, underneath my smiles and laughs, lies a secret soul, just dying, dying. the pain over not having him, tortures me at every chance...

i dream of him everynight, every dream becoming more like what i wish we could be, but then all hope is crushed, i wake to find myself, back to reality, reality.

if the only way i can be with hm, is to dream and hope and cry, i will dream and hope and cry all the time.

i sense a time coming soon, where i might lose him to soem other girl, i hope it takes longer than i think, cuz my heart can't take it, can't take it,

all the aching, all the pain, makes me wish for a simple solution..i can't take take it, can't find a way to escape my pain, i can't..

i know everyone thinks i'm crazy.. the way i love him seems a bit obsessive, but if they knew how he makes me feel.. maybe then they would understand..

he makes my life worth living, without him here with me.. i think i would fade, i'd disappear into a cloud of depression, day by day my soul would fade.

a day without him is like living in a world without the sun. i honestly can't stand the thought, of losing him to her.

she makes me sick. she causes be pain, does she know just how her ability to steal him away makes me feel? i wish i had that power, it would dominate my world,
but no..

i have none of that and i have nothing to show. i've lived this way for far to long, its time i speak up, make my feelings known.

i want him to know, the pain he' caused, also just how much i really care.

but if i do, what will happen?

i spend my hourse ponderign the thought, build up my courage, just to have it ruined.

now its time for me to stop, stop crying, stop hoping, my life as this is gona end, so..


The author's comments:
this was written.. in reference to my feelings.

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