Happy | Teen Ink

Happy

April 5, 2009
By Ruzele Strauss-Hayden BRONZE, Park City, Utah
Ruzele Strauss-Hayden BRONZE, Park City, Utah
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

Happy


When its light out side the heart is light

When it's dark the heart is heavy...
Sometimes that's a good thing
To focus on the bad and tune out the rest
To turn the lights off and stare into the darkness; of the world, of a
day, of my life and see it for what it truly is
To see the sounds of the night
And here the repetitive beating of the loved heart next to you
Then to listen to the lifeless echo my own heart and here the
loneliness that resides in the place of happiness
To go through the day with out a care come to mind, and a plentiful bag of
friends to choose from
And my day, spent lonely and friendless, wondering if that perfect
someone will ask the question I’ve been longing to here
Eating lunch alone, and all my free time spent in the library,
studying the fashion magazines, hoping some will notice the outfit I
try to comprise with my secondary, look-alike clothes, and fake
plastic, hand-me-down jewelry
To go home and video chat with your long-distance oh so perfect
college boyfriend
While I spend my time expressing to everyone how happy I am. While
inside, I am suffering from the loneliness and disappointments of my
life and being alone
It's ok, I have the darkness, which takes me to a place I can never
live, erases the pain and sorrow of the day
And comforts me, it's my darkness and I will never let the fake
florescent light of your life in
I'm happy
Just me…and my darkness


The author's comments:
This poem I actully wrote while I was in the dark; I had a horrible day at school, when I got home I went into the bathroom and sat down with the lights of and picked up my phone and started writing--well actully typing-- and when I was done, it realy ment something to me. I hope everyone who reads this will be able to use the message of strength and corage and use it in your own lifes, writing is my way to expresses and release my emotions and I hope that you enjoy this!

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This article has 2 comments.


Auntie said...
on Apr. 16 2009 at 8:12 pm
What a moving poem. It helps bring understanding to me about the struggles you have as a teen. People on the outside don't have any idea that you are lonely. You are beautiful and special and deserve love and kindness from all those around you

candy9591 said...
on Apr. 16 2009 at 6:24 am
This is a very powerful glimpse into a life that looks great from the outside and the struggles required to keep up that look when in reality you are trying to find your way. I am impressed with your insight and struggle to get through these difficult years. It is that insight that will get you through the darkness to true light and joy.