lost

April 3, 2009
By KevinM PLATINUM, Xxxxx, Arkansas
KevinM PLATINUM, Xxxxx, Arkansas
25 articles 0 photos 20 comments

Lost

Lost
Never to be found
Left to die
Alone
I see your face
Your eyes
I can hear your
Voice a
Sweet
Soft
Velvet voice
that would make the honey bees jealous
Day and night
But you are not here
But none of that matters
But I am still here
Dying
Lost



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This article has 9 comments.


on Apr. 19 2010 at 6:35 pm
Shabanana SILVER, Teaneck, New Jersey
8 articles 0 photos 45 comments
kool ill go check it out but please help me out with my poems!! thanks -shana

on Apr. 19 2010 at 4:29 pm
KevinM PLATINUM, Xxxxx, Arkansas
25 articles 0 photos 20 comments

my new poem broken glass is out YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 


on Apr. 17 2010 at 8:40 pm
Shabanana SILVER, Teaneck, New Jersey
8 articles 0 photos 45 comments
ok great looking forward!! would you mind giving a little helpful criticism on some of my poems? thanks -shana

on Apr. 17 2010 at 8:34 pm
KevinM PLATINUM, Xxxxx, Arkansas
25 articles 0 photos 20 comments

yes that to i made a lot of type os in this one ( i have a new poem out the field it is one of my better ones )

still waiting on like 8 more 


on Apr. 16 2010 at 5:55 pm
Shabanana SILVER, Teaneck, New Jersey
8 articles 0 photos 45 comments
much better but i would also suggest that you remove the but from "But none of that matters" 

on Apr. 16 2010 at 1:42 pm
KevinM PLATINUM, Xxxxx, Arkansas
25 articles 0 photos 20 comments

one line shouldnt have a but ( the line but i am still here it should be i am still here ( type o )

 


on Mar. 31 2010 at 7:41 pm
Shabanana SILVER, Teaneck, New Jersey
8 articles 0 photos 45 comments
no problem. i know that i would want critism to my poems so that i can make them better so i try to help out others as well.

on Mar. 29 2010 at 6:56 pm
KevinM PLATINUM, Xxxxx, Arkansas
25 articles 0 photos 20 comments
Thank you for the criticism. i might revise it and take some out i can see that now that i look at it again 

on Mar. 17 2010 at 11:22 am
Shabanana SILVER, Teaneck, New Jersey
8 articles 0 photos 45 comments
I think this poem is really good but it would be better if there weren't so many buts.


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