I am the smell of freshly cooked tamales that covers the house like a heavy blanket

I am the tall-pine like tree that covers my bedroom window and haunts me late at night

I am the late night shows that play on tv and keep me up reminiscing about the past

I am the anxiety medication bottles that stand in front of my tv like gloomy ghosts reminding me that I am not alone

I am the prayers quietly spoken at the dinner table

I am my mom’s warm hugs given out at every family reunion

I am the screams and laughter of my cousins as we all run around

I am all the chismes being whispered in the kitchen by the women of the family

I am the burnt meat being cooked by the men too entertained by their jokes to pay careful attention

I am all the loud, guitar played music that holds different rhythms and slowly begin to pull people to the backyard as they begin to dance

I am the week-long vacation in New York that was ruined by the cold, snowy weather

I am the vintage photos that are slowly beginning to fade from everything they've gone through yet continue to hold pieces of my innocence and light up my room late at night

I am the memories of Mexico City’s streets full of life

I am the barrio in Mexico that slowly became my worst nightmare

I am my baby brother’s dead body being buried after only being born for 11 hours

I am my parents’ 13 year long love that ended because of the love my father began to feel for another woman

I am the red roses that signified my parents’ divorce

I am the 3 day long trip across the border

I am my brother’s 4 year long cancer journey

I am the late night visits to the hospital

I am my abusive alcoholic step dad whose kids scarred me for life

I am my country who is slowly falling apart while I watch from miles away without be able to do anything

I am Katya

Soy todos los hispanos y latino-americanos antes y después que yo

Original poem by George Ella Lyon