The way he talked about me decided my future.
His method of confrontation in the form of condescending conversation toward the quote unquote habits I had made me decide to not express my opinions, thoughts or interests, just so he could scroll through a Pinterest session without my interruption in the form of emotional expression.
And no, Dad, I'm not supposed to be like you.
While that may be the case biologically, and in your case, ideologically, it is certainly not the case historically and I know that because of the hammering into my brain that you so kindly did at an age where I didn't understand the difference between tough love and judgement.
I didn't know what was wrong with my beliefs, but you sure did.
You sat there and for hours and end ranted about how love is not for everyone.
How love is not a right that everyone deserves in the kingdom of God and His son.
How love is not real for everyone unless they love the opposite sex well I have news for you, buddy and yes I say buddy because once he said it in my face while he poked his finger in the place of my heart leaving a blue bruise in my emotions, and to my friends, this is old news.
My news to you is that love is for everyone. Love is for every single person regardless of their sexual preference which by the way does not lower their intelligence regardless of your illogical arguments in the starting set of your lectures which just decided again my future's texture, rough and insecure.
And the scary thing is I almost turned into you.
I almost had your beliefs and conservative mindset all made in the fear of a 50s suburban culture end and I'm so glad I have a mind of my own.
And I know that your angry outbursts are comfort that you run to but you don't have to take them out on your children.
Please listen to this.
I love you, dad. And I never wrote to insult.
I only wrote so you could understand the things I said when I told you I didn't know how to talk to you.
I want to be able to.
Please let me be able to.