Letter to an old friend

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This is how it starts. It feels a little strange.
A premonition in my heart that says life's about to change.
A glance at that someone I've never met before.
You seem to catch my attention from way across the floor.

I see you play that game. I know that you should lose.
You're the type that has love and lost. And I'm the type you wouldn't choose.
I know you should be out. A better girl has got you beat.
But you deny what you haven't seen and continue playing on your feet.

But before I get a chance to explore this new discovery
My time ran out. My sudden interests became nothing but memories.
But then I saw you again and I felt something inside,
I could have delved a little deeper but I just let the chance fly by.

And when we were finally brought together, when our paths had crossed for good,
I immediately fell for you, as I knew I would.
But I didn't want to be the audience for a movie in which you were the star.
So I stepped out of my comfort zone. I stopped watching from afar.

I broke all the boundaries and finally became your friend.
But as soon as our story started time was running out again.
We were so picture perfect. A Cinderella fairytale.
I never thought it would disappear, I never thought it would fail.

Until the following year brought a change in atmosphere.
I knew what was going on and I regarded it with fear.
The scene had suddenly changed. You started to move on.
One day you were begging for my company, the next day you were gone.

I can't believe I was so selfish and hurt because of the change.
Had I been patient and mature perhaps now I wouldn't feel so strange.
I don't know why I cared so much. Maybe we were meant to be this way.
I saw the signs, I knew it'd come, and yet I just let you slip away.

You could've stayed with me had our cards been dealt right.
But why am I complaining? There was no reason for you to try.
And though we're happy now, though our choices worked for us,
I can still see the signs, and I'm still envious.

I thought our time apart would only make me stronger.
But when we met again, I saw that absence truly made my heart grow fonder.

It wasn't a foolish infatuation, as I was prone to do back then.
But a feeling that at first I mistook for love. Then I realized; it was the need for a friend.

And when we met again, we played our childish games.
To you, everything was normal. To me, nothing was the same.
And I looked at where time brought us. I tried to make these feelings pass.
I tried to stop focusing on our picture perfect past.

I can't believe I was forced to leave, that could've been my chance.
All I wanted was to rekindle a friendship, not start some fairytale romance.
All I really needed, all I wanted to see,
Was where your battles have taken you, but they merely caused one in me.

But today, I encountered yet another old friend,
With whom I also shared a past that came to an abrupt end.
He and I went through what you and I went through.
Though he wasn't perfect like you, I loved him as I'm prone to do.

And we grew apart, just like you and I did.
I didn't know who I felt closer to: You or him.
I saw the signs, hit myself for letting them come true.
Thought I had done a repeat of what I did with you.

But today this old acquaintance and I had our childish words.
And my burdens of the past turned out to be friends; we had all matured.
And the casual conversation between me and this old friend
Led to a light invitation to becoming friends again.

And I thought maybe you and I likewise could start a new chapter
Maybe this could lead to our happily-ever-after.
We've got a couple of years before the rest of our lives,
There will be other chances, there will be a next time.

It won't be as personal, everyone will be there,
But as long as you're with me, I'll know that you still care.
And though I can't choose my world, and who and what goes on in it,
I will choose to be your friend again, if only for a few minutes.





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This article has 2 comments. Post your own now!

Cynthia A. said...
Mar. 19, 2009 at 11:58 pm
pahahah thanks girl.
i love your crunk username by the way.
 
sooacrunk94 said...
Mar. 18, 2009 at 12:47 am
You are amazing. Your writing never ceases to fill me with awe. I know you have a future in writing. Congratulations
 
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