It took me a minute to understand what was being said, but I liked it.

I think you have an interesting narrative here, and you told it in an interesting way. I think it's interesting how you open with the rose, which is thought to be a symbol of love, but then build the poem to be about an abusive relationship that ended with murder. Is, then, the red of the rose symbolic of the blood on both sides of the relationship? In the first stanza: Because you're writing in the present tense, it should be "watches" In the second stanza: I think it would flow better if you said "She says she loved him...." Furthermore, I think you forced the rhyme a little bit with "she prayed for him to go slow." That line just doesn't really make much sense and sounds a bit awkward. Perhaps, "She prayed for him to die slow?" Or another rhyme? In the third stanza: What do you mean by "one by one?" That doesn't make much sense. What is are the "ones" he is taking? It seems as if you are forcing the rhyme once again there. Additionally, there's an error in tense again in the last line. If you meant that in the past, he thought he would hold her forever: It should be "would" and "died." Furthermore, it's "'til," with an apostrophe. In the fourth stanza: either a semi-colon after "screams" or start the second line with "From." In the fifth stanza: There are several awkward wordings, and I think it has to do with syntax. The two lines that stand out are "Long-sleeves and jeans she wore" and "To him she became a bore." I understand that you are trying to make a rhyme, but I think it's forcing the rhyme too much. In the sixth stanza: It should be "took;" there is a typo. Additionally, there's another spot that's awkward because of a forced rhyme. This one is "didn't have a clue." It should also be "Now she is sitting here..." And I would also suggest adding an article before "stories," making it "telling her stories..." All in all, it was a nice piece. Keep writing!