Hold Me Close

January 20, 2009
By
People stop and stare
They sometimes ask you
How that scar got there

But mine are easy to hide
Mine you see. . .
Are on the inside

Mine are rips and tears
Mine are burns and stares
Mine are shown from a past
That shouldn’t have been there

The scars that don’t show
Are the ones that hurt the
Most. They are the ones that
She inflicted, the ones that
I hide the most.

These scars that I hide
The ones that you can’t see
They are the ones I got from
Her on her one woman killing spree

You see she didn’t kill ME
But she did on the inside
She didn’t take my life but
Instead she took my sprit,
My flight.

Now I can’t get that back
Even though I tried. I can’t
Get my mother back even though
I thought I could.

She was the woman that I could
Talk to, the one that was there
Until daddy left now I can’t find
One hair on her head that is the
Same as before. She changed then
Became the monster she had feared
When she was growing up, she cried
The same tears, she had the same fears!


Now for her I cry tears of blood
Now for her I cry tears of fear
For now mommy is back on her
Killing spree, only this time she
Doesn’t want to kill me.

Mommy wants to kill herself,
Which long ago might have been
Fine with me, but now that I
Found I can care now I don’t know

Mommy wants to be with a guy in
Jail, mommy wants to give me up
But backs out and takes the pain

I’m starting to think that mommy
Isn’t doing this for me I’m starting
To think that mommy wants to kill
DADDY

I never really knew until I saw
Him go that this is where I’d be
Sitting, this is where I would go
I never really thought that daddy was
My option till I saw mommy become
All of my fear.

Now all I want to do is cry
All I want to do is try
To get her to see that maybe
Just maybe, she still
Might love me, like she did so
Long ago maybe she will hold
Me close and never let me go?

Some people stop and stare and
Ask you how that scar got there.





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