Today

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Today I heard a whisper,
Today I heard a lie.
Today I saw a dead man shiver,
Without any alibi.

Today I see the stars,
Promising in their solemnity.
Than I look to fiery mars,
And see a lack of my own dignity.

Today I feel pain,
I feel rage to no right.
Today I feel I have worked for no gain,
I feel consumed in my own spite.

So I swallow them again and close my eyes,
I let my mind wander to the skies.
My head begins to ring like a drum,
And I pray that tomorrow I will be numb.





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claire W. said...
Feb. 21, 2009 at 7:40 pm
i love this.
it at some points is confusing but i think that adds to its beauty.
and yes some of the ryhm seems forced but i think it shows that its an awkward subject. im sure some people will disagree with the negative bits actually being good but they are to me... i love it.
 
xhelloxlovex14 said...
Feb. 21, 2009 at 5:21 pm
Your last stanza has a different rhyme scheme... I like what you have to say, I'm not a huge fan of how you said it. Some rhymes felt very forced... there were too many words/ syllables, which interupted the flow. But I liked it, a lot actually.
 
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