orbits we fell out of.

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i,
am your nose and
you eyes i couldn't inhabit, deep pools of

wishful thinkings.

i am your ears and
we make jokes as we stretch them and speak

like pale Yodas with much more to worry about.

i am the little frog that lost her tail in the harsh

stream of the river we wished we would go

see sometime and we wouldn't take daddy with us

because he is always yelling.



i want to be the nights we spend,
socialism and proletariat and farmers with dirt in their
fingernails. i want to be the dusk we made
a blanket out of and you told me that i can

do anything, and i sighed into the newborn sun.


i want to be the smile on your face

the first day i didn't need a substance to

grin. and again i could feel the sun tingling

through my fingertips and you were a smile and

you gazed deep into me and together we

sticked the broken pieces, filling

every spot with more and more love and

frogs and the cats we fed and the

stars we named. i want to be your smile and

i want you to remember this in mornings when

your whole body aches and you want to

get up to work for me and i want you to

remember that i always appreciate the

blessing you gave me.


i wish i was more careful,
in all those evenings i threw my anger up on
you and you didn't say a word and just sealed your thin
lips shut.

i wish i was more careful,
all those times you asked me for
one little favor and i didn't know i took you
for granted, i wish i didn't how i wish

i wish i was
a better daughter and i wish
i didn't scar your heart with
every razor cut for every time i thought i failed. i wish
i didn't make you go through sticking your
fingers down my throat and i wish
i had taken poison mindlessly rather
than pills and the note

'i'm sorry.'


i am sorry, mum ' i am sorry for
i fell down too many times and i took
you with me

i am sorry for the times i
took everything and anything for granted and i
wanted to be the sun but forgot you would have to
orbit around me and

i'm sorry for i never guessed that
things can escape gravity
sometimes.



i promise, we will both be

shooting stars and every time you feel tired,

i will steal a little cloud for you

despite that we don't have

much left after all.





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