The Monster

January 23, 2009
I was falling
from my throne in the sky
from the shelter of my life
from the once happy times
i was falling

fear, panic and depression
slowly took over
and i became a shell
of the person i used to be

i became almost lifeless
walking from class to class
always avoided
but never noticed
i was a ghost

nothing could stop me
from sinking deeper and deeper
into the darkness
no one really tried.

when the pain swelled up
to the point i could not take it
IT spoke to me

the monster that lurks
in the back of my head
whispering promises of the blade
praising the joy it could bring
if i surrender.

yet i ignored it, the monster
and i went on with my
so called life.

till now

while i am alone
in a world full of people
i am so alone

rejected by those who i needed
ignored by those i wanted
forgotton by those i loved

now i am no longer falling
but landing in a darked place
where something speaks to me
where the monster sees me
he reaches out a hand and offers
his help

i fought those who fought me
i ignored those who ignored me
i forgot those who forgot me
i hated those who hate me
i regected the world that regected me

i welcomed that monster

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