my guardian angel

January 2, 2009
the weatherman promises rain,
but all I see is the bright, mocking sun.
it smiles down at me
as if mocking my sorrow,
laughing at my insignificance.
the sun knows me better than I know myself.
the sun has seen me cry.
but today the sun is smiling for someone else.

right now I wish for darkness
and the soft loving light
of the moon.
how many nights has she watched over me
kept me safe
in the hell that is my home?
sometimes I pretend
that the face on the moon
is my grandmother watching over me.
with the kind of love only a grandmother can give.
a kind of protection
that a parent cannot provide.
but my grandmother is far away,
so I watch the moon
and hope that she is looking back,
my guardian angel.

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