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About to Melt

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The earth was melting over,
along with my eyes.
I just barely saw the sign
that made me sure that I would be alright.
The pool was near, I wiped the sweat
off of my five-year-old forehead,
and raced to the public fountain of youth.





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because_ican said...
May 14, 2009 at 3:02 pm
I really love the simplicity of this poem. The shortness of it makes me think that it is by a child, but it is still very sophisicated.
 
makesmesmile said...
Dec. 15, 2008 at 10:21 pm
omg that was amazing! i loved it!
the 1st time i read it i was like....huh?
and then the second time i read it it made a lot more sense
 
mae said...
Dec. 15, 2008 at 10:01 pm
i like thos a lot. i never thought of a swimming pool as so poetic!
 
gcracker31708 said...
Dec. 15, 2008 at 9:56 pm
hmm. interesting. the first time i read through it...i was thoroughly confuzed..haha. but the second time it made complete sense. nice job, i really like it. =]
 
nickalatte8118 said...
Dec. 15, 2008 at 9:55 pm
Yay! great poem Dara. I think it flows very nicely.
 
LadyLeighlyn said...
Dec. 15, 2008 at 9:52 pm
Dara, that was really good! I liked how it made you think that it was going to be something bad, and then it ended pleasantly. =D
 
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