Waiting, Wanting, Watching!

December 1, 2008
By Cristal Perez, Los Angeles, CA

We don't expect, because we don't know.
How can we hold others when we can't even hold ourselves?
Love, wasted on the young, vulnerability kills the soul.
Waves shift up, down, high, low, left to right. They can seem to last forever, or even a few beautiful moments. In the end, they disappear growing a new wave.
A cycle of what we think we need, a drug, unable to breathe.
When everything's gone, we feel alone.
Feeling feelings untrue, only we want to hold on to.
Not able to let go to that sweet smell on your shirt.
So easy for you, I can see it in your eyes.
Months pass by and still I feel, not as much, just a flame, I keep alight. No, I don't know why. It's my choice. I can throw it out if I like. But I really don't.
I keep my wondrous eyes on it, hoping for a change. Hoping for it to grow again.
It's cold and I feel I need it to keep warm or die, my only choices. But I'd rather die! I'm done waiting, wanting, watching. I'm sick of disappointments! I'm gone!

The author's comments:
Learning to let go was the hardest part. I think it is for everyone, but you can't rest your life in anyone but yourself. This was a lesson I'll never forget.

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