She Grew Up

November 21, 2008
By Amy Scott, Columbia, MO

As I saunter outside, the autumn breeze flutters my hair.
I close my eyes and I am overcome with memories
As I reminisce about my carefree childhood,
I watch my life rush by like a movie I can’t rewind

From playing on the beach with my cousins in the sweltering sun
To the first day of kindergarten’s many emotions,
The memories are as crystal clear as they have always been.
They feel like they were just yesterday, and in a way, they were.

For an instant, in my daydream, I am a little girl once more.
But I am roused from my fantasy
And suddenly, I am a teenager again.
I open my eyes I wonder what has happened to me.

I have transformed into a girl my family doesn’t recognize
I’ve traded in Mary Jane shoes for flip flops and stilettos,
Exchanged coloring books for romance novels,
And instead of finger painting, I work on another canvas- my face.

Turtleneck sweaters have morphed into v-necks,
Frilly dresses are now plaid shorts and tank tops.
A blue comforter has replaced my Barbie sheets,
And in my shower there’s a can of shaving cream where bubble bath once was.

My idea of fun used to be a visit to St. Louis
I would love a Saturday at the zoo, followed by an evening at the park.
But now I would rather go to Shakespeare’s with some friends
And then watch movies all night in my basement.

Whatever happened to the childish joy of Christmas?
Every year decorating for the holidays becomes more of a chore.
I no longer wait up for Santa, but play his role and fill the stockings myself,
And my gifts lose their appeal when I know exactly what they are.

I look in the mirror and a gawky teenager stares back at me.
I ask myself what became of the youth I once was.
Although I know the answer:
She grew up.

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