I don't Hate You

November 16, 2008
By Shelby Hines-Elzinga, Redmond, WA

I don't hate you, I'm not mad at you
But I hate what you've done
And I'm mad we were never who we were going to be

I thought you loved me, you said so every night
"I love you, do you love me?" you asked into the phone
And you'd make me say yes before I left

But when I finally did you turned around
You changed your mind, how could you so fast?

All week I only wanted to hear you call me baby in that voice of yours
Sending tinkles to my fingers
The way you'd call me a fruitcake when I said something funny

I couldn't call you all weekend
Your name soon erased from my recent calls list
The one name I could always count on being there and I'd smile just at the sight when I looked

I carried my phone in my pocket all day
Hoping maybe you'd call back with a change of mind

I wanted you more than anything
To wrap my leg around yours under the table at lunch
Share a secret pat on the knee where no one would see
Lay my hand over your heart and feel it race just by me touching you
Pull you behind a wall and kiss you on the lips after school

It hurt everytime I saw you, I got a longing feeling
Something I didn't quit no all too well
I thought we were at least friends, but you didn't speak, not even look the next day

You don't know how it felt to want you so much and for you to say goodbye
But it was on top of that to see you everyday at school with your back turned to me speaking to three other girls
Not even a "hello" or wave had come towards me

I became mad, jealous, angry, and said I hated you
But I forgive you now
And let the truth be known, I never hated you
I only hated what you did and how we never got to be what we were going to be
You wrecked it, it's not ok but I'll live

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This article has 1 comment.

lilly6627 said...
on Dec. 12 2008 at 4:59 am
hey i luv ur poems! i feel like i actually relate to them. you an amazing writer!

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