Have I wasted truth?

Why isn't it enough
to want it with all my heart
why do I stop trying
when at last I see the sun is shining

And yet I feel weak
I believe I am broken
I've given it up
the most important thing that keeps me waking up

And is it pathetic
that I compare him
to my greatest friend
what would you think if I told you
its just subconscious
and I'm unaware?

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