Elmo’s watching you in the night
Getting ready to take a bite
Your blue pajamas will taste so good
And Spongebob slippers are his favorite food.

But, best of all, he enjoys
Torturing little girls and boys
That playful character on TV
Has turned against you and me.

Creaking floors tell you when he is near
But since you sleep, you shall not fear
Or realize your impending doom
When Elmo comes into your room.

Up the staircase he will come
He’ll lick his lips and whisper, “Yum!”
And you sleep like an angel, peacefully
So Elmo knows you shall not flee.

Shall he barbecue or fry?
To eat first the hair or perhaps the eye?
With carrots or with celery?
What’s for dessert, he’ll have to see.

And he won’t even leave a clue.
Like it or not, you know it’s true.
And if Elmo has things his way,
You’ll never see another day.