November 27, 2013
I fear that I am dying.
Dying on the inside.
I can feel myself leave my body and go somewhere far.
Somewhere far from reality.
My soul goes to a terrible place where I am forced to watch people suffer.
The other tortured souls are going through the same I have gone through.
The demons in that place strap me to a spiked chair and push me down upon it.
The spikes rose through my arms and legs, allowing little blood to escape.
I like the feeling, but I need blood to run in warm, thin streaks.
I wiggle my arms to induce more pain and the demons look confused.
They decide to let me make my own misery and go torture the other misfits that have left their bodies.
Their screams pierce my ears.
Their bloody bodies break my heart.
In the crowd of the lost there is a girl.
I watch her cry as she is beaten and hurt.
I want to run to her and hold her in my arms.
I struggle to get out of the chair, it feels like the straps are getting tighter around me.
I need to get to her and save her from this place.
I watch her as she looks up at me.
I can see the fire in her eyes, I can see the hatred she has for the world.
I finally break free of the chair and run towards her.
She breaks free of the demons and is running towards me.
I slow down, so does she.
The demons are smiling at me knowingly.
Soon I’m right in front of her.
I slowly raise my hand out to her and she follows suit.
My hand is so close to hers.
I press my hand up to hers, but I hit a cold, flat surface.
I was looking into a mirror the whole time.
The girl with fire in her eyes and hatred in her heart is me.
The reflection of me starts to decay.
The skin starts turning a brown color and begins to peel away.
My reflection starts to crumple and falls to the ground.
I watch, horrified, as I turn into dust.
What I just witnessed is going on inside myself.
I’m dying on the inside.
I can feel it.

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