Does it Matter?

October 17, 2008
By Ariana Daniel, Fayetteville, AR

He's gone, without a goodbye
He up and left, without even a thank you
He knew it was supposed to be special, like he'd care
He was drinking, and the pressure was too much
There on the bed, that wasn't even his, or mine for that matter
I said no, but it was too late, he took what he wanted, because
'Baby, it's fate.'
We were supposed to be together, but not another look he stole
Just another notch on his belt, and a pain in my heart

Time passes, a week at the most, I'm feeling wierd things
I'm looking at guys differently now, seeing them, WANTING them
A complete stranger, makes me a lady of the night
I thought he liked me, but when he threw the cash at me, i knew it was a lie
I turned myself into a working girl, with just one guy, and i can still blame him, my first
He took it and turned me into a monster,
Not a wanting monster, a NEEDING monster
Without it i felt wierd, like how were the relationships supposed to work WITHOUT that?
Sitting here thinking, wondering, crying to myself
As i hold a child close to my heart, I wonder if she will ever ask who he is
I wonder if i will ever know

The author's comments:
Not a smart choice, and i hope the girls out there are smarter than i ever was. I don't regret my little girl, i regret not knowing her father, well, rather not knowing who her father IS.

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