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Monster

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I never forget the pain I've felt,
the anguish,
to anxiousness,
rejection to depression,
like playing with a venomous snake,
getting bitten every time.

I try to find the best of who I am,
without putting myself down,
but my conclusion,
is that I'm nothing.

What I think I can do, I can't,
what I try to succeed and achieve all died,
my happiness and aknowledgement, all gone/

All this heartache I hold inside,
from the many crushes I've wanted to hide,
as to one who had none,
while the other had many,
but the same happened for both of them,
I was left alone.

Can you truely speak of how much beauty is in the eye of the beholder,
when the beholder is as blind and self-centered to what they really see.
I see a complete monster as I stare into the mirror,
me stripped bare of all that I am.
And what do I see,
is a monster created from the devil's mind,
already brought into this world for nothing,
worth nothing,
wishing itself gone as it stalks around in the form of good,
while deep inside its filled with lies.

Its fingertips were fattened to fit its disfigured shape,
a glob on the earth,
its forbidden to live on,
Its face as hideous as the heavens true earth,
while it still lies,
and wants to hide,
while its pride is carried away.

Still pure to its ungodly bones,
the attitude sits as an excuse to be left to die alone,
the creature stalks,
and wants to love,
only wanting acceptance,
but those lies whisper that a creature must not feel.

In this cruel world the creature was booted to fend for its own,
trying not to go insane,
while still keeping its form,
to make sure its still 'human.'

Shivers goes up its spine,
as the words of this melody makes it feel,
makes it want to break free of itself,
while everyone teases.

Thrown in a small cage,
to breathe air of this fire created while the creature sits and stares,
holding its breath,
knowing how soon its death will come,
wood thrown in the fire and it squeels,
but stays still.
'Let death take me as I am, as I am the creature that not even god can fix.'

It tried to stay on,
to hold its breath,
wanting someone to come.

The creature gives up on wanting this anymore,
it breathes,
the smoke burns its throat,
more wood thrown at the fire,
it coughs,
it mourns,
it prays,
then dies.





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sweetvanessa1 said...
Oct. 10, 2008 at 3:44 pm
this poem is so deep...i admire the poet for she is very realistic in her work...i hope u keep making more poems
 
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