Pitter Patter Literature | Teen Ink

Pitter Patter Literature

July 20, 2013
By WriteOrWrong BRONZE, Grosse Pointe, Michigan
WriteOrWrong BRONZE, Grosse Pointe, Michigan
3 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
Sometimes you just need to take a nap and get over it. -Maura Stuard


Tear stained windows cried.
Scarce light glimmered nothing.
Soundless yellow streaked.
Marches dictated skies

Waiting, sheets crumpled,
lone silhouette ingrained.
"Come back," she whispered.
Invitation denied.

Right brain activate.
Black text conquered white page.
Raced against sunrise,
or endangered words fade.

Daylight forms writer's block.
Dark temporized the fear.
Storms ceased empty minds.
"Sorry bed."- restless night.

Letters submerged, then
rapidly reappeared.
Creativity
-replenished (until dawn.)

Fingertips craved ears,
despite former hushed lips.
Click, clack cooed sweet keys.
I listened, sleep-deprived.


The author's comments:
Rain inspired me to venture into unfamiliar territory: poetry. The syllable count is 5, 6, 5, 6.

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This article has 11 comments.


on Jul. 31 2013 at 7:51 pm
WriteOrWrong BRONZE, Grosse Pointe, Michigan
3 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
Sometimes you just need to take a nap and get over it. -Maura Stuard

Thanks so much, I really appreciate it!

on Jul. 31 2013 at 3:47 pm
WriteOrWrong BRONZE, Grosse Pointe, Michigan
3 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
Sometimes you just need to take a nap and get over it. -Maura Stuard

I like you. Haha, it is rare to find someone like you but because you are so sweet I will just pick something random anyway. :)

on Jul. 31 2013 at 2:39 pm
Carpe-Caffeam GOLD, No Where, Florida
10 articles 0 photos 444 comments

Favorite Quote:
“If it weren’t for the coffee, I’d have no identifiable personality whatsoever.” –David Letterman

Sure, will do! :D Don't worry about reading my stuff, just think of it as free feedback since I like your writing.

on Jul. 31 2013 at 11:36 am
sophistryxo SILVER, St. Louis, Missouri
5 articles 0 photos 32 comments

Favorite Quote:
“There was nowhere to go but everywhere, so just keep on rolling under the stars.”
-Jack Kerouac

This is great! I love the title and your phrasing! Not to mention that your vocabulary is excellent! Keep writing poetry!

on Jul. 29 2013 at 9:02 pm
WriteOrWrong BRONZE, Grosse Pointe, Michigan
3 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
Sometimes you just need to take a nap and get over it. -Maura Stuard

Thanks so much! That was really helpful. Actually I would really love if you could look at 'Stop! No, You Stop!' What would you like me to look at for you? Or is anything okay?

on Jul. 29 2013 at 7:07 pm
Carpe-Caffeam GOLD, No Where, Florida
10 articles 0 photos 444 comments

Favorite Quote:
“If it weren’t for the coffee, I’d have no identifiable personality whatsoever.” –David Letterman

I adore your vocabulary here! Amazing word choice! In some areas, it feels like the syllable count got in the way (as it's a bit choppy), but otherwise I admire your work here! If you would like for me to read any other pieces, please let me know; I'd be happy to XD

on Jul. 26 2013 at 5:37 pm
LexusMarie PLATINUM, Las Cruces, New Mexico
27 articles 0 photos 423 comments

Favorite Quote:
The more control you have over yourself, the less control others have over you.

Well, it's just that for me, I think free verse is the easiest because you just do what you want with it and you aren't following rules.. and I think when people are just getting a feel for poetry they should start with free verse because they are just trying it out and they want to enjoy it.. not stress themselves by going on a certain count. 'Free' verse gives ya 'free'dom! And it's no biggie, but if you feel like it, I could use some feedback on my new poem 'To She Who Had A Secret':)

on Jul. 25 2013 at 2:00 pm
WriteOrWrong BRONZE, Grosse Pointe, Michigan
3 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
Sometimes you just need to take a nap and get over it. -Maura Stuard

Thank you for the encouragement. And really? I always thought syllable counts were easier because they had a format to follow. Thanks so much! I'm really glad you liked the title :) Let me know if you need any feedback, I would be happy to give some.

on Jul. 25 2013 at 1:58 pm
WriteOrWrong BRONZE, Grosse Pointe, Michigan
3 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
Sometimes you just need to take a nap and get over it. -Maura Stuard

Thanks so much for your feedback. I have a few songish poems that I've been messing around with and then I was like hey I think this is free verse so I am trying to get those posted. Thanks again :)

on Jul. 25 2013 at 2:58 am
LexusMarie PLATINUM, Las Cruces, New Mexico
27 articles 0 photos 423 comments

Favorite Quote:
The more control you have over yourself, the less control others have over you.

Hello! The title is really interesting and I think will catch reader's eyes, so it's always good to have a great title as it's the first thing the reader will see. For your first time with poetry I think you did an excellent job and I think you should continue to experiment! The set-up is really nice and for poetry being abit new to you, it's impressive that you went along with a syllable count instead of doing just free verse since it's so much easier. I love your inspiration, nature; rain is such a beautiful thing to write about. I think you did a wonderful job with this! The descriptions are very clear and easily visualized by the reader. I hope you'll continue to write poetry.. it's really beautiful!

on Jul. 25 2013 at 12:36 am
laceandcoffee PLATINUM, Rio Rancho, New Mexico
21 articles 0 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
"We make up horrors to help us escape from the real ones."- Stephen King
"But I don't want comfort. I want God, I want poetry. I want danger, I want freedom, I want goodness. I want sin."- Aldous Huxley

This is really good considering your just begining to feel out poetry. Maybe try some free verse sometime. Having more freedom in what and how you can write really helps you more comfortably define your style. I think you have potential! Keep going!