Light Binds Desolation, Love Burns Away the Chains

September 9, 2008
By Davey Phillips, Chelsea, AL

I awake to find myself lost, somewhere
I don’t know where I am, or why im here
But I look to the sky and feel rain
The ground beneath me is turning cold and the air is growing thin
Someone has brought me here, something has cast me away
But only moments ago I was living my life in luxury
This cant be right, this can’t be.
But suddenly I feel as if I’ve been here before
Maybe I’ve been here all along, just never realized it
Maybe it’s been wearing me down and now it’s overpowered me
Whatever it is, it cast me into this barren wasteland
With nothing but my shadows to keep me company

I wish my mind comprehend this incongruity
Maybe I could find my way out if I knew why this is happening
It has my mind strung out and im afraid its beyond my conception
Out of reach for any part of me
That’s why I scream I don’t understand this
If discernment was promising believe me id take the stand
But I know ill never know the answers, im far too weak
So am I just meant to stay here? I cant stay here
The air is growing far too cold, my eyes can no longer see
Ive never felt so lost and shapeless, never felt so alone
Im like a man wandering in a desert
As the days pass I grow weaker, everyday my hope is dwindling
If the man has no water slowly his body loses its strength
And soon enough he will fall and his heart will give out
Now as I feel as if that man is me. Love is my water and I have none
I remember how long ago I would lose myself to reality and find myself somewhere else
It wasn’t always a nightmare, not always such a desolate land like this
Sometimes I saw back to the day where I stood strong and with confidence
In those times I dreamt of you
Of how you found me in the darkness and brought me light
My darkened cave was suddenly abounding with luminance
My eyes should have slammed shut but your beauty left me speechless
Slowly as I gazed I saw that the light was coming from within you
As externally beautiful as you were, this was not its source
Through your eyes I saw your heart and nothing has had me more amazed
To this day I remember meticulously the day you changed me
The day my shadows faded away and I stood as myself and only myself
The best months of my life

But now I’ve found this world to be cold again
I’ve found myself lost in this cave as I had before
But this time there’s no sign of any form of radiance
Its only me and myself, standing in the midst of this darkness
Not even the stars look down on me at night anymore
Their eyes are closed like a sleeping giant, their guidance mislaid
They shun their light and hide it away
To them and their glory I am undeserving
Maybe to me this world and its people are my stars
And I am undeserving of their love
Maybe my sins have cast me away from humanity as an outsider
An exile only to be remembered by the one who loved me most
An invisible man living melancholy in another realm
In this empire there is no sun, there is only rain
Only darkness, only shame, only despair, only ruin.
This lands is dismayed by its own absence of light
It calls out to you, please bring me salvation. Bring me hope
And somewhere out there I know your trying to find me
But maybe your lost as I am. This ominous sovereignty has its ways to imprison
If that book reads true then maybe im meant to stay here
Because Id live here for eternity to save you
This iniquity has no grounds to restrain such purity
You are loving, you are caring. You are light
Flames prevail over darkness; they illuminate the shadows and conquer
You are the fire in my heart, you are my world’s flames
You are my sun and my stars and my guidance
Now is when I need you most, if your not lost as I am
Burn away these binding chains and set me uninhibited
And Ill together we will cast this malicious depravity away from us
No longer would I be invisible, no longer would I be exiled
Your love would bring me all the gratification I need
Now I never see myself envisioning anything equivalent to this
So as I wait in this desolation, as I lie solitary in this cave
My dream of you will be what carries me through the night
And for as long as I am destined to remain here

The author's comments:
This has elements of bvoth nonfiction and fiction. Tne illustration of a storm and a wasteland are fiction because he never was physically in such a place, but instead it was used to describe the feeling of being in such without the love of the person that was missing. His world had become barren and lifeless, because all his happiness and joy resided in her, and she was gone. The storm represented how the internal war that had begun because of his loss was getting worse as the moments passed

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