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Insanity

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Look under the cushions,
Beneath the cat,
Behind the curtains,
And in an old hat.

Where could you be?
You were here yesterday.
I thought I'd be fine
If I locked you away.

Now people are staring;
I'm falling apart.
Some people are glaring;
This wasn't smart.

I lost my head
When I left it behind.
I know that I said
That it was still mine.

But sanity comes,
And sanity goes,
Alone it becomes
A thorny-spiked rose.

I'll have to catch it again,
Before I'm too late.
'Less my sanity leaves me
To my own insane fate.



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Prometheus This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Dec. 3, 2012 at 7:21 pm:
Rhyme rhymes with Rhyme.  Ha. It's good, relatively speaking, but I think you have the potential to do better.  Try to think of more meaningful rhymes if you can.  I know I have no right to say any of this.  But I think you could become a very good writer. You have natural rhythm and a sense of almost whimsical energy.  Write more.  Revise.  And don't listen to anything I say.
 
KestrelThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Dec. 4, 2012 at 6:08 pm :
XD so helpful! haha, yeah, I've been trying to write more meaningful poems, problem is the more meaningful ones I have are the more personal ones that I don't know if I want to post. I'd do that anonymously, but I hate not being able to take credit. I have one I'm thinking I'll post though, that's a bit more cryptic emotional and less silly.
 
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