Sinking into the ice water, i could feel my body pushing chemicals up my neck into my head. i was aware of what was going on, i knew i was drifting into sleep.. more like plummeting. an anchor around my ankle, i couldnt stop myself from sinking deeper. and deeper. but i knew what was happening, i wasnt in control. my dreams i'll keep private, but they were so much more than this fairytale life of mine. i try so hard to convince myself of this messed up crazy little fairytale. it's so hard to believe this, and it's starting to make me sick. i could feel my body quickly coming back to reality, the chain cut loose from the anchor. just as i was about to submerge from this watery dream land i loosened my medicated RX sculpted jaw and began to pump the chemicals back into my brain. i was fully aware that i shouldn't be capable of this. but i was consciously putting myself back into this world, sinking back down into the murky waters. this happened several more times. until light creeped through the curtains and i was forced to come back to this..
f a i r y t a l e.