It’s all coming back so fast,
To fast for me to handle.
It’s all coming back in a wave,
A tsunami of emotions.
It’s circling around me,
like a vulture seeking prey.
It’s a cloud of fog,
think and dense,
Consuming me like i’m drowning in quick sand.
It hits hard.
Like a gun shot to the chest,
crushing your ribs and suffocating your lungs,
coiling around your heart like a fresh plant of ivy.
As they stream down your face,
every drop brining back a memory,
one you thought you had forgotten.
Tensing your muscles and you break a sweat,
until you feel like you’re about to burst,
You take it.
Take it to your wrist and slowly cut,
deeper and deeper until you’re numb,
feeling no more.
Letting the blood trickle down your arm and into a pool of sanity.
You lay your head back in grief,
asking questions that can’t be answered,
until you move on.
You cover it up like it never happened.
Put on a fake smile and pretend to be fine.
But you’re not fine and you know what happened,
and you can’t forgive yourself for it.
You’ll try to forget what you did,
why you did it,
things you can’t explain.
Until the next time.
When it will all happen again.
Just like before.