Lock My Door | Teen Ink

Lock My Door

March 3, 2012
By AsheeNicii BRONZE, Catawissa, Pennsylvania
AsheeNicii BRONZE, Catawissa, Pennsylvania
3 articles 0 photos 0 comments

Favorite Quote:
No regrets


Why'd I open up my door for you
The second time around?
So you could get my hopes up
Then go and break me down?
Maybe cause I'm stupid
And, yeah, I guess I'm naive
But it's also because I wanted to
God how I wanted to believe
You said you never lied to me
That you mean everything you said
You really do love me, miss me, want me,
It wasn't all just in my head
And so you make me wait for you
Because you know I will
Keep me holding on and on
To a void that you won't fill
There is something unexplainable
Feelings I won't deny
And you know this, it's obvious
Do you like to make me cry?
You kissed me like you meant it
Said you wanted me instead
Things weren't easy for you and her
So you played with my head
It took one night, one look, a single spark
To ignite this fire called us
Our flame was beyond our control
It was scary, it was lust, it was trust
And I remember the one time
You came by, December first
Our silence, God it rang so loud
And you kissed me with such thirst
And you touched me so delicately
Like I was fragile, like I'd break
You held me there with big brown eyes
Like you knew what was at stake
Why'd I even chance it
We met, I knew it wouldn't work
Your life was on the fast track
And, of course, there was her
Did you ever consider
That maybe I was too young
To be caught in something so intense
Something far more than love?
So why'd I open up my door for you
A second, even third, time around?
Because we both wanted another chance
For our fantasy we'd found
Then you told me you were leaving
I felt my heart instantly break
Maybe our chances were slim before
But this goodbye I'm not sure how to take
I remember thinking "This is how it feels
to have your heart completely sink"
Maybe now I can move on
I'll miss you more than you might think
But I'd begged you to be joking
Tell me you weren't going away
You said you loved me, that you'd try,
For me, to find a way to stay
I seem to always find myself
Breaking down and crawling back
With us I just can't stay away
But simplicity is something we lack
Yeah, things were never easy for us
So much got in our way
We both wanted it to work so damn bad
But we had a disappointing twist of fate
Everything got way out of hand
It all just fell apart
We both agreed to just give up
To leave it at a broken heart
I guess "we" won't be back again
I won't waste my hope anymore
I guess this is where I say "forget me"
I guess it's time I lock my door.

The author's comments:
This poem outlines a very intense, emotional relationship that I had with a guy. He had such a large impact on me in such a small amount of time and I still have no idea what it was about him. This is one of my most vulnerable poems.

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