I know how much it would hurt my mom. But I can't stop the thoughts. My head is fighting a battle everyday. My mind is full of ways to end life itself. But my moms word speak to me as they mean something, something beautiful I wanna find.
Grandmothers are suppose to be loving and caring. But she shows some type of hate towards me. She yells as if my fears are meaningless. As stupid as they might be to other, they should be somewhat understanding to you. As much as I dread it. I'm a part of you. Everyone else see it, but I dont. Your an evil to me. Your a monster. But to a blind eye your normal? I can't think of nices words for you. You can do everything for me and I still won't find good in you.
I'll take baby steps just to over come what ever and every thing I fear. I'll be strong and alive. Alive for my mom. Alive for a love. Alive to show you I'm not ridiculous or childish, or dramatic, or annoying, or stupid. I am human. I am Bryanna Ray. Your friend, you child, your grandchild. Love me. Please.