As I lie here with my thoughts
I can't help but think of you.
It's not what my memory that holds me captive,
Not what you did or didn't do.
Its the idea of not knowing
One half that flows inside of me.
That makes thinking of you dad,
Harder than it ever needs to be.
Some think I'm lucky
To have not known you at all
But they obviously haven't stepped in my shoes
To me my loss is not so small.
Laugh lines, wrinkles, little quirks and such
I don't know anything about him
And this is anything but luck.
Imagine looking like a stranger,
Or having traits from someone you don't know.
Death is never easy,
Though it never fails to show.
So another day another night
This stranger remains on my mind.
And though it does no good hope
I wish I wasn't left behind.