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Once, Before

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once, before
my joy came out in laughter
and my pain out in tears
but now,
my laughter is my sorrow, hidden
and my tears
are stored inside me
surely I will drown with this??
but no, as I see him I realize
him to be only
the tears within my eyes,
the haunting memories
within my head,
and the chill
running through my spine
love?
there was, once.
Now all I can feel [for sure]
is the pain
but I still know
that I can not hate him
I can not get rid of him
his name is engraved within me
and just like my love for him,
will never go away.





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