See You Looking

March 20, 2008
By Emily Little, Madill, OK

I see you looking out from behind, as I close and open the heavy eyelids of my poor eyes.
Blinded by the thoughts leaking through my mind,
I sometimes wonder, what it would be like to fly.
Short and stubby like a bonsai,
My self-esteem is low, now that I won't deny.
I wish I was infallible so I’d be the only one in the world,
Incapable of making mistakes, now that would be my allure.
I cant really imagine why you keep looking my way,
It would be easier if I wasn’t a face full of dismay.
I try not to sneak a peak back, but you make me so weak.
I take a small breath and act as if my neck has a crick.
See you there, breathe once, twice, turn back around.
Keep a steady pace, and be sure to hold my own ground.
I keep on walking along with the wind,
My body just going with the flow, I’m letting it bend.
I think about nothing and nothing some more,
Why does it all lead up to something I really deplore?
My thoughts are like cracks in the sidewalk, a new one everyday.
But the old stay there too, just sitting there, with a whole lot of pain.
I count to sixty then start over again, how many seconds that I’ll never receive back until this depressing walk ends?
I listen as the old birds sing, how ever glad I am for it to be Spring.
A few minutes go by and you are still dancing in my mind,
I force myself not to look back because I’ll question my sanity if you are nowhere to be seen behind.

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