Beauty and Fear

April 15, 2008
By Kristen Goldman, Hesperus, CO

My head pokes up just over the horizon of the boat.
A slight breeze catches my hair making it flow as…
As if it was a galloping stallion with its mane flowing freely behind it
The wind calms as my boat and I slowly drift farther and farther out into the sea.
I sit up tall and elegant.
I look around admiring all I can see,
Birds above me and dolphins down below.
I turn just enough to see the other side or view of my boat,
My boat starts rocking excessively,
I am pushed side to side by a moving object down under,
I look over the edge of this little ship and see a dorsal fin,
Not like the others I was enjoying,
Not that of a dolphin not that of anything graceful nothing I expected…
I try to sit calmly trying not to worry,
And yet I find myself panicking with tears of fear trickling down my face,
I curl into a tight ball hoping it will keep me safe.
I lay there for moments on in,
Waiting for my boat to get tipped and I fall under,
Under the water with the predators I dread,
But I was not turned nor flipped,
Not my boat and I but we got a frightening bite in the side,
Water flooded into my dry and cozy boat that I thought of as home,
Home on the weekends, vacations and such,
It was such a relaxing place in that boat,
With nothing to fret about, nothing to think about,
Just wanting to get out away from everything, all the stress,
But nothing compared to what was happening now,
As my boat slowly sinks, I slip into the water,
I’ve feared it, feared this time,
I have heard stories of what happens to people in with sharks, untamed sharks,
And the result is nothing good, nothing at all.
I tremble trying to stay afloat,
Sharks circling my waist,
I look down and see a cast, a shadow of what will soon show me my end,
But as I watch these circling beasts,
I see a familiar pattern; white blotchy blobs scattered all over the smooth silky skin,
It’s a Whale Shark with her babies,
A harmless creature out hunting,
This was really nothing to be terrified of,
For I float in the water with these gentle creatures,
As their velvety skin slides across my own,
Making me realize that such beauty shouldn’t be a scary thing.
I find myself floating to a shore,
Full of beautiful washed up treasures on a small forgotten island,
I stand up and glance around,
I can see the other side of the island from here.
I’m alone,
Alone at last,
Doing what I always wanted too,
Being on a soft sandy beach,
Where nothing disturbs you; you just relax.
I lie on the sand, feeling as I did when I lay in my now sunken boat,
With sudden splashes of water hitting my toes, mist hitting my face,
So relaxed, feeling like I am free from the world and all the pressure.
The sun has sucked all the excess water from me and my clothes and now I am dry,
I tumble onto my back, my stomach gets relief; soft cool sand meets it below.
I close my eyes tight, admiring all I hear,
Waves crashing, seagulls screeching and breezes blowing,
It’s the perfect setting.
A big wave comes spinning in and my legs get soaked; I start to shiver,
The feeling goes away,
As the wave spins back to where it came from.
I feel that I have been out here stranded, rather been here on this mystical island for hours,
I left about six this morning,
And by looking where the sun is,
I say it’s around 3 o’clock,
And well,
I promised the mother I would be back by noon to pick up the children,
Take them off her hands and we’d have a great afternoon.
They’re probably all worried, but I am doing just fine,
Sitting her sun bathing, having my own time,
My eyes are still sealed shut,
When I hear a plane fly over head, yet out at sea,
I see a helicopter hovering there looking for me,
A banner hangs down with my name covering both sides,
A person calls out my name,
I ignore them, hoping they don’t see me,
They circle around the area the looked first,
Move over about ten yards and circle again.
It’s a hallucination because they wouldn’t be out here looking this far,
For I don’t know where I am and I have a great sense of direction.
I watch as they keep circling various parts of the sea to see if I am really, well seeing what I am,
But the sun soon falls and my mind drifts away,
It couldn’t have been a better day.
I wake up and look around, this isn’t the ground that I remember falling asleep on,
It’s much harder, and so uncomfortable, compared to where I was;
My eyes slowly focus and I am no longer out on my island of peace,
I am in a place of lighted things,
I look around and seem to see,
That I am in a hospital, in a room for recovery,
They say I’m dehydrated, but I believe not,
They say I stay, so I lie in this bed of sorrow,
Wishing I’d be out of here by tomorrow, but no I can’t leave,
For they have to watch and make sure everything’s just right and my body’s functioning correctly,
So I shall reside here,
Till’ the day that I leave,
And go back out with the waves beside thee.

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