I’m Not Okay

March 28, 2008
By Destiny Esper, Saint Louis, MO

As my adrenaline gets to pumping
My heart beats fast
I feel like a fiend without ecstasy
How long will this last

Nothing but horrible thoughts of suicide
Circling my brain
Nothing but hate and tears
To remind me of my pain

I hate everybody
They can all go to hell
My life is so horrible
Whereas theirs are just swell

I have only myself
Farewell to all of the rest
I act like I’m okay
But this feeling is burning my chest

My friends all betray me
My family doesn’t care
I’m drowning in hatred
But gasping for air

Matters are my responsibilities
To take into my hands
Nobody can destroy the blueprint
Of my self-destructive plans

I’ll announce my suicide from the roof-tops
They’ll think I’m insane
I’ll fly like Peter Pan
As the bullet tunnels through my brain

No more hatred in my heart
Nothing more left to say
No more denial of the realization
That I’m not okay

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