Just another roadblock

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Your heart was my desire, but through you’re eyes I see pain and fire.
Rejected I was from your unwilling love, rejected I was shunned away from you. You pointed to the door when I gave up my heart. Had spilled it into your arms but you dropped it to the floor. There was too many pieces to put back together so I left it to wither and shrink. You were the only person I was willing to give my heart to. The only person who I wanted to spend forever with. I walk the walk of shame, no pride belongs to my name.
From then I walk along sidewalks counting the cracks, and smearing the glitter and liner off my eyes. Drips of water cling to my fingers but I flick them away onto the burning hot sidewalk.
My body drags on, though my heart has been shot, its remains splatter to the floor. Why bother trying to fix something that cannot be remade?
Cars wonder by me, leaving the lingering of there exhaust, gagging me with overhang of smell.
For you I would walk through desert, and jungle. For you I would swim across the artic ocean.
Give up my belongings, connections and all.
Yes I would burn and freeze, all I needed was your caring self.
But your eyes clearly showed that you have no want or need. So here I am, choking to death off your last few words.
Heavy headed with hurtful thoughts I lay down in the brightest shade of grass.
Counting the seconds till my eyes flutter to a closing, and hoping to wake up with the slightest memory of you.
But I am not surprised, but left disappointed while I think of the days I counted the freckles on your cheeks and the emotions of your eyes.
And the day you had forever changed me and helped me find myself. Life keeps going I see, my world has not ended. I have found a roadblock and must find a new route.
But the highway of life is still running, and cars keep moving. Ill just have to find a map and figure my way. I regather myself, and toss my hair adjust my clothes and carry on. I will find my way, I can get there. With good intentions, and a little faith it will be hard, and I have no doubt, But it is believable and dreams do come true. Although I cant say I miss you. I miss the countless days we spent together living our life on the gold coated roads. Nothing on earth is perfect, although we like to believe so. Everything ends at some point whether controlled or not. So here I am, stuck in the traffic of life. Traffic you may ask? My life story.





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