The War Within Me

August 19, 2011
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The hurt and pain within is deeper than any pain
Traveling threw my veins and within my heart
Scarring me for life
My heart is fighting trying to find a way out
Seems like a never ending battle

On the outside I spread a big smile across my face
Knowing that I will truly never be happy
Laughing even though I want to cry so badly
Singing with joy even through there never really is a joyful feeling to my life

Days go by and still no end to the war that’s deep inside me
At night I cry myself to sleep
No one can hear me, just how I like it
Trouble sleeping with dreams that becomes nightmares
And thought of mistakes that could have prevented this war

My heart is struggling
The pain is getting stronger
Fire running threw me
Ice spreading around my heart

Pain is moving in where the love should be
Now I’m feeling empty
I’m feeling lost, confused and useless to the battle
Willing to do anything to end this war
Every conclusion I have ends up in ashes

Failure to stop the war makes it worse
The pain is now fury
My heart is getting frustrated

Almost giving up my heart cries out for help
And when help doesn’t come my heart realizes
There is no solution and it will never be happy

Giving up on the war my heart lets the pain over-ride everything
I freeze in my tracks
The next I know I’m screaming out and no one has come to help
I have officially fallen
The end has come
My heart has lost and the pain moves in forever

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