March 5, 2008
By Ashley Anderson, Easley, SC

I can't do it

But I need to
It's not right

Who cares?
I do!

Do you?

That little voice
inside my head
keeps mocking me.
It jumbles all of my thoughts
i know the question I must answer
But I don't know how to answer it.
i'm caought between heaven and hell.
This answer should be simple.
It's not.
Welcome to pergatory,welcome to my life.
I wish I could just run away.
i can't run away from you
Your sweet voice will remain in my head.
Forever it will ask me why.
I scream in the middle of this crowd.
No body hears me.
This is all happening too soon, too fast.
The world is spinning rapidly around me.
Everyone and everything is a blur.
I can hear the voice of reason laughing.
Let me hold you close.
Give me something to keep my feet on the ground.
I'm such a hypocrite.
I hold you so tight yet I rip you apart.
God, the tears won't stop.
I'm grabbing for a dream
maybe happily ever afer.
i'm clawing at nothing.
I pull back, my fist full of air.
The air is escaping this cell.
I grasp for a breath of freshness
but, my lungs are not satisfied.
I'm breathing in nothing.
i'm suffocating in my own self pity.
I haven't even thought about you.
Yet, you're the only thing on my mind.
I feel so selfish.
Hush little baby don't say a word.
My head is full of screaming laughter.
The voices haunt me.
Time ticks down.
I'm falling into a tunnel of darkness.
No light shines at the end.
You reach for my hand.
But I just let myself fall.
I fall deeper and deeper
Never hitting the bottom.
maybe there isn't one.
I'm too far in to cry.
Too tired to scream.
In this hell,
I'm trapped.

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