Heartache and deception,
No longer able to trust my senses,
Clouded is my heart's conception,
Torn between my two loving menaces.

A flame that once burned,
I thought I had blown it out,
As days passed, lessons were learned,
I beckoned for him even when in doubt.

Nine times I broke the love of another,
Yet I am afraid I might once more,
For the admiration of a former lover,
Adraid I may hurt the one I adore.

Oceanic eyes full of tears,
As I try to determine the man I desire,
I resurface old feelings, and fears,
I split in half for the men I aspire.

Although here I am,
Unsure and confused,
Though my love is damned,
Openly hurt and bemused.

I try again to be fair and just,
When I fear both will hate me,
Hopefully I won't lose their trust,
I want to loosen my chains and be free.

I don't want to be alone,
Without either to love,
A withered, broken-hearted crone,
Acting as a psuedo dove.