i wanna go back
to the days of
lopsided hearts, drawn on
paper with a quarter sun
in the upper right hand corner,
with orange and red rays shooting out at me.
to the when "he loves me"
always occur
and never "he loves me not."
days of generic flower ...
a red dot in the center
with too many yellow petals
with symmetrical green leaves on a long stem.

where hopscotch boards appear on
black driveways in heavy
pink
street chalk.
an era when the bell of
an ice cream truck
meant an extra special treat
that humid evening.

the days when white and black and
blue and green and
grey and brown and
purple and orange were
just meaningless colors and not a
judgment
test for skin.
when teddy bears were filled
with love and
comfort, its
right ear hanging by
two thin, brown threads.

i wanna go back
to barbecues and picnics
filled with triangle sandwiches
and hot dogs and
potato chips ... even the green ones.
when my multiplication tables
received a number one spot
on the refrigerator.
when inhaling the freshly
cut grass while popping off the
yellow heads of dandelions,
playing with the neighbors'
white bijon frise.
to the days when
i'd construct a building of
blocks and my brother
would knock it down.

i wanna go back
to those days
that are now pictures
in a dusty, maroon photo album
and i want to stay there and
never return.