For a moment I wanted to forget about you, forget about what I had to do, and forget who I was. I wanted to think, but not of you. I do that too much. I wanted to swim amid my thoughts, go back, move forward. Say more, think less. Do more, think less. Feel more, touch more, care more. Think more. I wanted to cut my hair short, be like some else so that I could feel like someone else. Some who wanted to talk all night, who wanted to be there every f***ing second, who wanted me as much as you wanted me. I tried. You only wanted me because you couldn’t have me. Then when you got me, you realized who I was. Who I wasn’t. That I wasn’t. I’m not anyone. I’m not yours. I’m not mine. I’m no one.
July 24, 2011