Free at Last

June 1, 2011
By , Oshkosh, WI
Free at Last

Fear finally approaches me,
I enter what used to be a relaxing room
her petite frame pushing just 105 pounds
She slips on her Mike’s Place t-shirt,
which once hugged her full figure.

She returns late on almost all nights,
The smell of cigarettes so strong
It’s overwhelming
She slides on her well-worn, green hoody
To then turn on the newest
and latest Intervention,
Unknowingly watching her own
down-ward spiral,
Mirrored through a television show
Of full-blown, helpless addicts.

Our reading nights no longer exist,
Our talks of Jodi Picoult’s best- sellers
are no longer present.
The life I once used to have
With my beautiful
And with my intelligent sister
Has disappeared.

Drugs take over her life,
Control her everyday thoughts
Feelings of worthlessness and depression
begin to take action.
Her way of thinking now distorted
Causing her to feel unloved
and unwanted as she
Isolates herself from friends,
From family,
From the people who love her dearly.

Worry and anxiety grow taller
The drug use escalates deeper
A young girl who at one time
Was at the top of her Class,
In the Gifted and Talented program
since the sixth grade,
Now, fades, into nothing.

She isn’t changing,
Her patterns continue on as pain
Draining to her lowest point
She looses herself so quick,
Is falling down so fast,
Her hope becomes the past

The drug dependence increases
It isn’t a secret swimming around,
But now a common conversation.
She enters my bedroom,
I assume to inform me
On the new, drug-filled story.
But to my surprise,
She says, “I’m pregnant”.

These words of change
can be for the better,
Or they can be for the worse.
When these words entered our home,
Our lives completely changed.
The use of drugs now vanished
She becomes who she truly is

The newly round tummy,
Sending kicks through my fingertips
Spreading excitement into me
Not only am I ecstatic to be an aunt,
But most importantly,
I have my sister back.

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