would you really want to indulge in corrupt indignity?

December 20, 2007
i want something that speaks to the people across oceans swarming with vividness

it wil be a defiant thing, an eratic thing, something worth hearing about, something worth paying for
i want to cross rivers on and not worry about what's on the other side

i want a day, one day,where i can steal and kill and speak my mind without worrying about what will happen

confusing green for blue and not understanding the difference

trying to be beautiful but failing,not succeeding, something indifferent like that

a window without a pane, just glass that frosts when it's cold and shatters when it isn't

i want everything i can't have and nothing i can

it's cold in here

winter is trapped inside me

my throat is frozen

i cannot speak

my mind is frozen

i can't be rational

my emotions have frozen

and withered away

my heart is frozen

i can't love

everyone else is warm

why am i so cold?

everyone else has a heart

if only coldness could comfort

if only bleakness could reassure

snow lies

it's white, scintillating sparkles give us a false impression of a clean untainted world

a glint of hope

with no purpose

other than to elude truth

oh but ignorance is bliss

emptiness is your thick heart-shaped box with no opening

i've been domesticated in a locked house with no key

thrown away, trashed, restored, adorned and thrown away again

would you really want to indulge in corrupt indignity?

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