Magazine, website & books written by teens since 1989

Forgiving

By
“Stop wearing my clothes without asking!” I yelled at my sister Kasey, while we were in my room. She’s always touching my things, she always with me. I just can’t stand to be with someone all the time, I can remember when before Kasey moved in with me I had more space, my room to myself. “Hey Hun” my stepfather Mike married my mother three years after the five years my mother felt lonely due to the loss of my father. I truly miss him, he was the best father anyone could ask her. He watched all my softball games, always spent time with me. We went fishing, skiing, and bowling even traveling anything you can possibly think of also even traveled.
It devastated me to realize that he actually passed away. Although it was five years ago, I can still remember it as just the other day. “Oh my god this can’t be true!!” my mother yells outside. I ran to the front door and saw polices and the paramedics holding my mother back from getting close to my dad’s dead body, crying. As soon as I got outside, I saw an ambulance truck outside, paramedics, polices outside, and two cars that was crashed. One of the cars was my dad’s car and the other car was somebody else’s that crashed into my dads car. Then lastly I witnessed my dad’s dead body on the ground, and tons of tons of blood on the floor. My heart dropped and so did I. I dropped to my knees and just starred at everything as if it was all a dream. I was visualizing everything around me differently. Everything around me was moving slowly, and all I could hear was silence.








I kept looking around to see if this was truly happening, and realized that it was. Then I took one more glance at my father on the ground and completely broke down. I cried so hard my eyes became red and almost as if it was swollen. I couldn’t take it anymore, as the paramedics and polices were trying to calm my mother down I tried running towards my father’s body pushing everything and everyone out my way, I wanted to hold on to my father, I wanted to see if maybe he was just sleeping, but unfortunately he wasn’t, I just didn’t want to believe it.


I was only eight years old when this happened and now I’m 16 years old. This was definitely the worst memory I’ve had and I will have to move on miserably but I will never forget him. The police said that a car crashed into my father’s car, then my father’s car slammed into a streetlight pole, and the pole slammed on my father’s car before he got a chance to even get out the car. This fractured his skull and broke the bones in his body. The pain was so severe which was why he died. My mother and I was miserable, depressed you name it. It was a huge loss upon us. He was an amazing Husband and father to me.




The next five years my mother and I were finally getting through and getting used to not having my father around us. One sudden day my mother came home with a man I never saw her with before. They were eating together enjoying their meals in our kitchen and telling stories to each other. “Kailyn I will like for you to come down stairs here to the kitchen to meet someone” my mother yelled while sitting. I put my ipod down, closed my laptop and left my room, to go answer my mother. “yea mom?” I said standing in front of my mother and her so called “friend.” I want you to meet Mike, Mike this is my daughter Kailyn. “Hun me and Mike are dating”. My mother said. This completely crushed me, Mike said “Nice to meet you” but I completely ignored him and my mother and ran upstairs to my room. I was crushed, how my mother could completely forget about my father.









Overtime, my mother explained to me why she was dating Mike, he makes her happy again, a feeling she hasn’t felt in so long ever since my father died, but yet she’ll never forget about him and it was understandable to me. Then one year later she fell in love with Mike and they got married. I got used to Mike and began to like him but never will he replace my father. And Mike agreed also. This was all in the past, it now been a long seven years. Five years of trying to get used to Mike and his daughter Kasey, my stepsister, who is the same age as me 16. At first I didn’t really like Kasey, I wasn’t used to sharing rooms I was pretty selfish to be honest. I hated sharing anything maybe that was one thing my parents didn’t teach me, not to be self or think the world revolves around me.








But I got over it. I got over the pain of my mother getting re-married and marrying Mike also having to get used to my new stepsister Kasey. We actually became close, “Kasey which movie you want to watch” I said to Kasey while we were on our way to the movies. We started hanging out more. We hung out in school, afterschool, and even on the weekends I truly started to trust her. Kasey told me so much about how she went through the same thing that I went through in our parents marriage, but a little different. Her father Mike was a rich man who was married to her mother Kate. Mike grew apart from Kate, divorced her and took custody of Kasey. Kate was left broke and lived with her mother. Kasey was hurt by her father and overwhelmed of the new changes.









After three years, she started to feel better, Mike started letting Kasey visit her mom three times a week. We both were going through so much which was we didn’t communicate that well and also why I began to trust her so much because she kind of understood what I was going through. I even told her about my three year relationship with my boyfriend Christopher. Christopher meant the world to me. We were best friends since we were five years old, we always played together, and everything you can possibly think of. The strange part was Kasey was becoming very close to him. “What are you going to do to me”? I heard Kasey whispering on the phone under the covers of her bed. I was in my bed trying to go to sleep but I just couldn’t because Kasey was talking to some boy.








I was really getting annoyed of Kasey talking to the same boy every night, leaving me with sleepless nights. But then came to find out she was pregnant with the dude she has been seeing, which was Christopher; the one I thought was my companion. I felt heartbroken and betrayed. How this has happened? I yelled to Christopher, “It was unplanned I’m sorry.” He said. I just couldn’t believe this, I was so hurt, deceived heartbroken depressed thinking “why me?” I just don’t understand or even believe this ever happened. I thought that in a relationship, your suppose to build a friendship first, that’s exactly what I did, but not planned, he was my best friend then companion now enemy.


The nexy day, I woke up and went straight to school, I felt like my heart was beating right off of my chest I couldn’t bare to see him in school, or I might just literally cry my eyes out. I gave him everything, I was there for him good times and bad times how could he repay me like this? I started walking the down the halls trying to avoid Christopher in school, I couldn’t let him know I’m hurt, I couldn’t let him know how much it crushed my world even though he must probably know already, how couldn’t he? We’ve been apart of each others lives almost our whole lives. I always believed that not all men are the same that Christopher was the reason why I had more than school as a priority.

Days and days went by and there have been silence between Christopher and I. I absolutely will not speak nor even look at him in the eye. My heartache went from being hurt to rage. Its been four months since the incident and I’m still ignoring Kasey also. I just couldn’t trust her, but I do not trust her but I hate her also. This hate is getting to me, I don’t even feel comfortable in my own home. Then one day after it’s been one year not saying one word to Kasey, I decided that I COULDN’T live with this hate anymore. I forgave them because Kasey is my sister and Christopher is going to be the father of my niece/nephew. But never will I trust them again; it is what it is I just have to take this day by day.





Post a Comment

Be the first to comment on this article!

bRealTime banner ad on the left side
Site Feedback