always waiting, always wanting

February 5, 2008
I used lay in bed at night with my eyes open
because they wouldn't stay closed.
They fixated on the obscurity of the room,
unable to see anything
but I didn't need to see anything anyway.
I wouldn't have been able to comprehend it
because I was too busy
wanting and waiting and thinking
of all the possible outcomes.
I was craving you and wanting you.
I was starving to be used
behind a mask constructed with
the idea of love.

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