January 28, 2008
Today i exist for words
a little match struck
no one to see her flame
not even i
groveling in muddy pleas
reeking of silences saturated in hesitation
neck craned sideways
into the corners of eyes
see blurs tumbling closer
lazy fields between treaded paths
growing thicker with
the incurable question marks
these loops are nooses!
so i humble my thoughts to words
fumbling after their prime
this juxtaposition
sobs in so many tongues
and has emerged cross-eyed
from the hot loins of my mind
and i stab it now
but it doesnt bleed an ounce
and i am here dissassembled
a heap of human pulp and inklings
collapsed upon the bottomless carpet
exhaling at last
until each mangled organ
feels and thinks and speaks
plunging laterally into the unknown
dig their heels in, stunned to realize they advance forward
then swish to devour their painstaking treadmarks
slug down their sweat
finally, defecating of
claustrophobic loneliness-
such apparent greatness
carved into digestible portions
slobbered over and speculated
reprocessed with meaning
pumped full of your own experience
and you haven't changed a bit
...except you have
you learn only what you suspected
you get this or you dont
and i swear someday you will
and the stifling gap between
this and that engulfing both
i salivate over analogies
so intangibly visible
these roots are mere seeds
our sensory pentagon is senseless
and if any of this probes upon your conscience
Strum! Scream! Sing!
'cause all i hear are my own echoes
the dregs of cerebral meanders stunted
trespassing limits
fate thrust against my face
dreams like hounds howling from afar
i was enlightened at birth
and i am forgetting myself
we all are and it hurts
our youth unfurling sleepy wings of
feathery collages of rotting inventions and trendy morals
plucked from the rectum of organic frustration
this counterculture suffocates
with a pretty scarf too
the shallow abyss unveiled again
and those who don't grab on plummet
to the ripe realms of infancy, asylums, and art
lured to the illumination of dark
we reap what we sow
poison what we know
stifling words to humiliate the self-pitied lies
eclipsing earthly bliss with pained cries
One was all that was needed
Spirit seeped and soon fleeted
Give me Truth!
and there is so much more to say....
I am sorry
you have been abandoned to your own devices by something that was never there in the first place.
Forgive me
I crumple against the spine of each tangent and can give no answer for it
I love you
It is the last naivete to shirk off the claws of reason
I thank you
you are the nectar of every moment.
you are perfection of being.
beautiful ugly sad ecstatic dull innocent free-willed alone sinful destined ignorant content worried succulent wise imaginary insatiate god mother earth daughter man dust love lust hate going gone
and so am i

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